Some time ago, a casual acquaintance of mine complained to me that he had no real friends, no real interests outside of work, and that, although he was dating, it wasn’t going well. Wanting to help, I suggested that he join a gym or weightlifting group, and supplied him with contact information for several in his area. This would give him some kind of routine — and purpose — outside work, I thought to myself, and his body would improve (which would be better for his health, and for attracting women), and, of course, he would make friends.
When, a couple of months later, I ran into him again, nothing had changed. He hadn’t contacted any gyms or any of the groups I suggested, and he hadn’t made any other steps to improve his life, which he now described as “not worth living.”
Perhaps he really had no interest in improving himself physically (even if it would have a positive affect on his spiritual and mental well being and on his life in general). And, certainly, we all go through periods of stress, despondency, or of feeling “stuck.”
I have noticed over the last year, however, a certain attitude of pessimism or defeatism in some people who consider themselves to be very serious, hardcore, and uncompromising individuals. Continue reading “The Cowardice of Defeatism”